Is Christian marriage only for elite women?

I’m reblogging this from a phone, so forgive poor composition.

Dalrock has this hopelessly backward. The presumption of Christian Life for men is marriage. Jesus himself made clear that he assumed men would lust for women, and commanded that each man marry the woman he fucks. Further, he can’t escape that marriage except by her infidelity. A woman, likewise, is commanded by longstanding Jewish law fulfilled and not overturned by Jesus, to reamain married once married, even if married to a man not Christian.

Nowhere in this discussion is either a man or woman considered worthy, much less DESERVING of marriage. Couples join, and once joined, a man cannot quit a marriage unless his wife fucks another man. I’m not certain the same is even true for a woman with (non-Christian) philandering husband.

I’m like a broken record on this topic, but Christians never seem able to see how plain the rules for marriage are according to scripture. The WORTH of a spouse isn’t relevant. Once a Christian couple fuck, they’re married.

Now, on the off chance somebody says, “Hey, this is about guys and gals who can’t seem to find a spouse!” I answer, “Are these people virgins?” If you’re a man, and you’ve never fucked, then, sure, you can then talk about finding a “good” woman. But if not, then may owe somebody a proposal.


Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.

–Romans 12:10, ESV

Last week Pastor Michael Foster and I had an excellent exchange in the comments of my post Unless the men are *Christian*.

The discussion was around what it takes for Christian young men to gain the respect of older Christian men, as we both agree that this is very important for a Christian man who hopes to attract a Christian wife.  Pastor Foster explained that for a Christian man to be respected by other Christian men he needed to prove himself to be exceptional:

In general, men gain status through diligent work. They outwork their peers in efforts and/or wisdom. That is what he meant by, “You’ll get men to respect you by working hard.”

I pointed out that only elite Christian men would be able to marry under this model, since he had also…

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2 responses to “Is Christian marriage only for elite women?

  1. That’s a really good question. Thanks for asking.

    I’ve observed many different opinions on this question. One of them is, “Whatever a man did before he was saved is part of his sinful life and thus isn’t relevant to his new Christian life.” I’ve observed that this custom absolves Christians of ongoing responsibility for reconciling past sins against other people.

    I would advise that such irresponsibility for past sin is a poor representation of advice and commands in Christian scripture. Specifically, a Christian cannot fuck outside marriage without intrinsically sinning; thus, a Christian who fornicates (fucks outside marriage) sins, while a Christian meaning to initiate a marriage by fucking doesn’t sin. As a rule, scripture advises (some say, “commands”) a Christian against marrying non-Christian. As a practical matter, a Christian fucking a non-Christian to initiate marriage would need to be very explicit with the non-Christian about his intention, and such explicit intent would entail a public wedding ceremony, whether or not an officiant sanctioned the marriage on behalf of a religion or a government. And, to be clear, the marriage doesn’t start at the wedding ceremony: it starts at the fucking. A wedding is simply a public announcement of who’s fucking whom – in other words, who’s married to whom.

    The case of paired non-Christians is more nuanced. Scripture addresses the case of a Christian married to a non-Christian spouse. If Christians are prohibited from marrying non-Christians (arguable, but generally accepted as scripture), then the only way a Christian can be married to a non-Christian is by either apostasy by the spouse or pre-conversion marriage; I think the latter is more likely the target of scripture (speaking here as an apostate).

    So, that begs the question, “When does fucking become marriage for non-Christians?” I fear that’s a bit beyond the scope of a comment response, so I’ll beg your patience while I prepare an exhaustive answer and publish that in a forthcoming post.

Don't bother.

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