How To Handle Girls Playing The ‘Poor Me!’ Act

For your consideration, the female mind at work.

I’m sitting on a restaurant patio, eating lunch with my wife, when I see a woman pass on the sidewalk. The woman’s lipstick is a particularly odd expression of faux-flesh orange. I remark, with an angered tone, “I don’t understand why a women paints her lips a shade no cunt would ever have.”

My wife responds, with a look of shock and anger at my coarse language, “Women can choose lipstick for colors other than their ‘cunt.'”

“Perhaps,” I reply.

“And I hardly wear any lipstick,” she adds.

“Besides all that lip balm.”

“And your mother wears very bright red lipstick.”

To which I can only manage a raised eyebrow.

Gentlemen, if we are to avoid so-called beta-bait, I recommend initiating the beta-bait conversation early and often in the manner above. She will compare herself to other women. You may as well construct the so-called conversation to your advantage. So, if you’re on the receiving end of, “I’m so fat,” may I suggest a response along the lines of, “Perhaps. But you know I like to slap-around thin girls.”

Don't bother.

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