Can’t we all just get along?

Every dungeon-delving party needs a wizard, warrior, priest, and thief. Perhaps every darkly enlightened neo-reactionary team needs a anarcho-capitalist, prepper, traditional religious conservative, and PUA. Perhaps this is the real human biodiversity.

Philosophies of a Disenchanted Scholar

Normally I’d post this to Return of Queens, but my login information is being annoying and my email to correct it is on the fritz for a while too so, after the jump —

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A Message from the Partiarchy: Regarding Courtship

The Patriarchy reviewed the post and comments at Free Northerner’s website regarding courting within the traditional conservative subculture. Our comments follow.

There is an exception to the rule, “No woman will ever take advice to date an uninteresting guy.” Your daughter will take your advice. So, go make daughters – and sons.

Free Northerner provides a useful anecdote. It illustrates several mating problems within the traditional conservative subculture. Sadly, the narrative he supplied easily could have been a narrative out of a cult community, such as the Fundamentalist Latter Day Saints. Their approach is built precisely to discourage the success of young men, and to drive those young men from a community.

As others noted, he failed the test by respecting the opinion of a girl’s father as relevant to his decision-making. Further, as others noted, the correct action was to focus the girl’s attention away from her parents and toward himself. Ultimately, a traditional conservative woman wants to answer to her husband, not her father. If Free Northerner cares to be a husband, then he should insist that a woman who wishes to date him redirect her obedience to him, not her father. Ideally, Free Northerner’s opinions will so closely match her father’s that the difference is pedantic, but even a cataclysmic clash of values should result in loyalty in Free Northerner, not her father. Scripturally, she joins Free Northerner’s household. He do not join hers. Not unless he want a hole drilled into his ear.

Regarding pornography, the Patriarchy recognizes only two viable moral positions: abstain entirely on moral grounds, or defend pornography fearlessly. Anything further is open to ridicule. We suppose, in Free Northerner’s particular case, the correct answer to the question, “Do you watch pornography?” would be, “Not since I met your daughter.” Lest there be any confusion, the Patriarchy defends pornography.

Generally, the notion that another man is capable of judging men – or that men would voluntarily abide such judgment – is completely alien to the Patriarchy. We discourage fathers from such dishonorable actions. Men either reach mutual agreement, or settle the matter with finality. Submission to authority is feminine, and we do not tolerate effeminate men within the Patriarchy, even among those that bugger men. Is Free Northerner both free and a man, or not?

Our advice to Free Northerner, in the sense of alpha/beta behavior, is this. If you feel your character was sufficient to date this girl, and you’re still interested, go find her, and ask to meet for coffee. Explain to her that you are still interested. You are a man, and you want her as your wife. Explain that she can walk away, and you won’t pursue, but if she wants a husband, she needs to choose that for herself – it’s not the decision for her parents to make for her.

The above is the Patriarchy’s advice for its daughters. We advise our daughter’s, but our consent isn’t necessary. Our daughters are the ones getting fucked, not us. They better be satisfied with their choice.

How To Handle Girls Playing The ‘Poor Me!’ Act

For your consideration, the female mind at work.

I’m sitting on a restaurant patio, eating lunch with my wife, when I see a woman pass on the sidewalk. The woman’s lipstick is a particularly odd expression of faux-flesh orange. I remark, with an angered tone, “I don’t understand why a women paints her lips a shade no cunt would ever have.”

My wife responds, with a look of shock and anger at my coarse language, “Women can choose lipstick for colors other than their ‘cunt.'”

“Perhaps,” I reply.

“And I hardly wear any lipstick,” she adds.

“Besides all that lip balm.”

“And your mother wears very bright red lipstick.”

To which I can only manage a raised eyebrow.

Gentlemen, if we are to avoid so-called beta-bait, I recommend initiating the beta-bait conversation early and often in the manner above. She will compare herself to other women. You may as well construct the so-called conversation to your advantage. So, if you’re on the receiving end of, “I’m so fat,” may I suggest a response along the lines of, “Perhaps. But you know I like to slap-around thin girls.”

Meanwhile, just outside of ferguson…

Some commentary about police work from St. Louis.

don of all trades

I followed a trail of blood up the concrete steps as Deja vu overtook my thoughts.

I’d been here before, just a few short months ago, doing the same exact thing, following a trail of blood to an open front door.

As was the case then, on this night there had been another call for shots fired heard coming from the street.

A trail of blood, an open door and no body to be found.

Just like last time, the person was taken to the hospital by a friend, so we wait to hear from the hospital when they make their mandatory call about somebody coming into the emergency room with bullets in their body.

As I was checking the house for another injured or dead person, I couldn’t help but notice that the house was exactly as it had been before.

There was no furniture in the living room…

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Where to find a good incel guy to date?

A Message from the Patriarchy: Where to Find Involuntarily Celibate (Incel) Guys

Emma the Emo posted a commenter’s question. It deserves an answer.

So, you a slut, you’ve rode the cock carousel till your crotch is sore, and you’re ready to get the fuck off the racing stallions and onto a workhorse. Where do you find a workhorse? Hint: it’s in the name.

Before we begin, know that there are two types of incel guys: loons and laborers.

You can generally spot the loons by certain characteristics. Among these are 1) horrifying hygiene, 2) dirty living spaces, 3) few friends.

Sadly, you cannot judge looniness by the usual feminist guidelines: anti-social behavior, physical condition, politically correct ethos. Such things usually portent a crazy person, contrary to Cathedral-approved opinion. Do not trust an apparently incel guy with good physical condition who says the right things and appears socially gregarious. He is either certifiably crazy or a pick-up artist and probably a recovering incel, but not what you’re seeking, all the same.

So, with some broad no-go criteria established, here’s a brief list of where you find incels.

– RPG gaming convention or gaming store
– book stores
– Japanese anime conventions
– Video game stores or the video game section of local big box retailer
– A surprising number of incels hunt and fish and collect firearms; consider a sporting goods store that sells firearms.
– Fast food and grocery stores – these guys gotta eat and nobody cooks for them

So, how do you pick-up an incel?

First, be interested in the guy. It helps tremendously if you’re not faking your interest. Next, laugh, especially if he tells a joke. Giggling is always good. Also, touch him. Get him to touch you. Follow him around like a puppy – don’t lead him. Guys who are still open to female companionship will welcome the attention and eventually become accustomed to your presence.

If you get rejected, move on. Disinterest in a man can’t be combatted. Similarly, bail on the guy if you lose interest, the sooner the better. Bailing early is a kindness.